My Name Is Sarah Palin, I’m Here To Help

Posted: June 9, 2010 in Current Events, Politics
Tags: , , , ,

With all due respect to the late Ronald Reagan, I do believe that the title of this post may be the most terrifying nine words in the English language!

From Sarah Palin’s Facebook page, a message to President Obama:

Please, sir, for the sake of the Gulf residents, reach out to experts who have experience holding oil companies accountable. I suggested a few weeks ago that you start with Alaska’s Department of Natural Resources, led by Commissioner Tom Irwin. Having worked with Tom and his DNR and AGIA team led by Marty Rutherford, I can vouch for their integrity and expertise in dealing with Big Oil and overseeing its developments. We’ve all lived and worked through the Exxon-Valdez spill. They can help you. Give them a call. Or, what the heck, give me a call.

Yes, a solution to the oil spill crisis is just one phone call away!  All the Pres has to do is give ol’ Saracudda a ring and she will provide all the answers.  So, what exactly makes Sarah an expert worth seeking advice from?

My experience (though, granted, I got the message loud and clear during the campaign that my executive experience managing the fastest growing community in the state, and then running the largest state in the union, was nothing compared to the experiences of a community organizer) showed me how government officials and oil execs could scratch each others’ backs to the detriment of the public, and it made me ill. I ran for Governor to fight such practices. So, as a former chief executive, I humbly offer this advice to the President: you must verify.

Wow, she does have a point.  Wasilla probably was the fastest growing community in the state, going from really rinky dink to just merely rinky dink.  You know, even that’s not true.  A town that has a population of 6,000 is really rinky dink no matter how you spin it.  On the other hand, she did manage to rack up a $20 million debt for the town by the time she left.  So maybe that’s what she is talking about when she talks about “fastest growing community”.  Also, there is no denying that when it comes to square mileage, Alaska is the biggest!  The vast amount of volcanoes, lakes, and unpopulated wilderness is incredibly hard to govern!  Have you ever tried to negotiate with a grizzly bear?  They don’t listen, they just growl at you (if you’re lucky).

Clearly she is qualified to give advice.  Just as long as the advice pertains to how to parlay experience as a mayor of a very small town and half of a term as governor over…um…a lot of land into $12 million in earnings.  Otherwise I’m thinking not so much.  Really, if things ever get so desperate that the President feels the need to call Sarah Palin for advice, I think you can pretty much stick a fork into this country!

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