Archive for June, 2014

Must...take...loss...with...dignity.  Must...try...to....smile.

Must…take…loss…with…dignity. Must…try…to….smile.

Let me be the…er…probably last to express shock, shock I tell you, that GOP Majority Leader Eric Cantor lost his primary.  Apparently when in our local election a candidate referenced Eric Cantor as being not conservative enough, that actually did and does resonate with some voters.  Still, Cantor had a 95 (out of 100) lifetime conservative rating from The American Conservative Union.  So what the heck happened?  How does a guy like Eric Cantor lose to a Joe Blow nobody?  Surely it’s not because he’s only 95% conservative instead of 99.44% pure conservative.  Right?

First, let’s check Joe Blow’s credentials.  I assume he has a name other than Joe Blow.  Let’s see, looks like it’s David Brat.  He is a “true” conservative (not like that Cantor phony!).  Surprise, surprise, he’s going to end Obamacare.  He’s a ‘create jobs by getting rid of immigration’ type of guy, so there he earns double points.  Balance budget amendment…check.   Christian values under attack?  Oh yeah, and in a big way.   They are under attack in such a way that they threaten life itself!  Oh, and by the way, God is pro-gun.  Betcha didn’t know that!   So anyway, certainly a very conservaty conservative.

The punditry pretty much decided that Cantor lost because he had made some comments that could represent tepid support for very limited immigration reform.  In fact, they declared immigration reform is now dead.   Hmm….call me crazy, but for something to die, it must have been alive in the first place.  Immigration reform was never going anywhere.  It already didn’t have enough support.  It wasn’t one vote to the good and then they lost that vote or anything.  Nothing changed.  In fact, Eric Cantor was pretty much screaming to the roof tops that oh no, he did not support immigration reform.  So the idea that Eric Cantor was going to be some sort of knight in shiny armor riding in to save immigration reform is just false.

Really, I think the reason Cantor lost is more nuanced than just a single issue.  I think you can go into several factors.  One, it’s what can happen when not many voters show up at a primary…it just doesn’t take that many votes to swing an outcome.  (Brat only got 36,000 votes or so.)  It can be what happens when you gerrymander, the views in a single district can become pretty extreme.  I think perhaps Cantor was more vulnerable to the ‘establishment’ tag being an actual House leader and not just a rank and file member.  And there is certainly a segment of the electorate who do not believe that they send people to Washington to be pragmatic but rather to fight an “enemy” that is the other party on all fronts.  That means you fight the debt ceiling raises.  You go ahead and shut down government over budget issues.  Not just some of time, every time.  Anything else is losing.

More than anything, Cantor’s loss is not a sign of change.  It’s just another symptom of the way things have become.  The ‘do-nothing’ Congress controlled by Republicans will just continue to do nothing, at least while there’s still a Democrat in the White House.

Yeah, I know that makes me a bad citizen.  But here’s the thing, to matter in Alabama, you pretty much have to vote in the GOP primary, like it or not.  And since I am not a big fan of the current day GOP, right off the bat I get discouraged.  But we do have a recent opening for the U.S. House Rep (Spencer Bachus is finally leaving after what I am thinking is about 100 years of service).  So lots of candidates have jumped in (not often there’s not an incumbent running after all).  So the other day, I start my research:

Paul DeMarco

Let’s see, he is the “committed conservative” (good to know, don’t like that half-ass stuff!).  Ok, ending Obamacare, supporting local business (jobs!), balancing the budget, Christian values under attack….ok, looks like he hits all the “conservative” talking points.   Next.

Chad Mathis

Ooh, he’s a “movement conservative with a spine”!  (Paul  you wuss!)  Oh, he’s ending Obamacare*.  A small market businessman who will fight for the free market economy (jobs!).  Check off balancing the budget.  He is Christian. (Are the values under attack?  Anyway, since he opens with that, I am sure he will protect those values!)  *Uh oh, when you look at the fine print though, Chad Mathis actually SUPPORTS some provisions of Obamacare.  Oops.  I’m sure his opponents exploited that in all the ads I’ve been ignoring.  Sorry Chad, better luck next time.

Will Brooke

Ok, he is the “experienced conservative” (he was conservative while you were still crapping in diapers Paul and Chad!).  Ok, he’s ending Obamacare too, a businessman (jobs!), reign in federal spending (balancing the budget I’m sure), and he teaches Sunday School (no mention whether Christian values are under attack, but he does support “traditional values”.)  Hold on, hold on.  How do I know you aren’t pulling a Chad Mathis and are not secretly cool with at least parts of the Obamacare law?

OMG!!!  Ok, if you didn’t watch, he takes a copy of a bill and shoots with a pistol.  Still not convinced?  He then shoots with a rifle.  Yeah, but that’s not serious.  Alright, he shoots with a f’n semi-automatic assault rifle!!!!  But darn it, it’s still there.  Finally he throws in the whole darn thing into a wood chipper (I must admit, I am a little disappointed he didn’t somehow secure a tank.  I guess even Alabama has SOME limits).  He’s not only going to end Obamacare, he is going to kick its ass!

Scott Beason

Scott is “Alabama’s foremost conservative champion”  (You hear him, champion!  You conservative losers!)  He’s going to take on those hippie liberals in Washington, like Eric Cantor & John Boehner!!! (Wait, what???)  Oh here’s something different, he’s going to end Obamacare.  He’s going to create jobs, not because he’s a business man, but because he is getting rid of those filthy illegal immigrants (double conservative score!).  Balance the budget?  You betcha!  Christian values under attack?  You bet your bible they are!   The conservative is strong in this one.

Blah!!!  What freakin’ difference does it make?  That’s Alabama politics right now.  I just don’t have the will nor see the reason to bother.  I have no reason to think that any of these candidates can’t “represent me” being the most conservative conservative to have ever conservative.   They don’t really need my vote to do that.

June 4th Update:

So there’s going to be a run-off between Paul DeMarco and Gary Palmer.  Hmm, didn’t mention Gary Palmer.  Let’s see:

Gary Palmer

Gary is “everything conservatives need” according to National Review.  Guess what?  He’s going to end Obamacare!  He is going to get rid of those darn regulations that prevent economic growth (jobs!).  Yes, he is going to balance the budget.  He probably does need to get a few more Christian mentions on his website, I can find only a reference to God in regards to being pro-life.  Whew!  I was worried there might be an actual difference in opinion.  Thank goodness that in a race of 8 hardcore conservatives, it is going to come down to 2 hardcore conservatives!  (Maybe the election will swing on whether or not Christian values are under attack?)