Things I Learned From The Last Republican Presidential Debate

Posted: September 25, 2011 in Current Events, Politics
Tags: , ,

  • Rick Perry has a sure fired way to create jobs for America.  He’s going to steal them from California!
  • Or even better, Herman Cain and his 999 plan.   It’s catchy.  Like a cell phone plan.  I’m pretty sure the plan calls for 9 cents a minute plus $9 a month for 9 months.
  • Mitt Romney said in response to an education question that first the federal government should get out of education.  Then he said “and secondly”.  Hmm.  It’s good to know that when federal government gets out of education, they will still be able to influence education.  Because I would have thought if the first thing the federal government did was get out of education, there would be no ‘secondly’.
  • Did you know that Michele Bachmann has raised 5 biological kids and 23 foster kids?  Because I somehow missed that the other one hundred times she has said that.
  • Illegal immigrants only cross over from our southern border.
  • The soldiers who fight for this country deserve our utmost respect.  Unless they are homosexual.  In which case, they only deserve our scorn.  Because who cares if they put their lives on the line to serve this country?  I may sit on my ass in the comfort of my own home while other people volunteer to get shot at.  But at least I’m not gay!
  • The elimination of DADT has made the military into one big sex orgy.
  • “Obamacare” is going to kill cancer patients.  Because government bureaucrats are so much worse than insurance bureaucrats.
  • When asked how you are going to solve this nation’s problems, anyone worth their salt only needs 30 seconds to respond tops.
  • That Rick Perry even brought up the idea of mating Newt Gingrich and Herman Cain should automatically disqualify him!



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